"Till this moment I never knew myself."

February 9, 2014

Dear Jane,

This fine quote from Pride and Prejudice is more true than you know, Jane. I realize that I did not truly know myself until the moment I began this tour. I am learning so much about myself as both a person and a performer, I hardly know where to begin. 

Firstly, I sincerely hope this letter finds you well and in the very best of spirits. I fear that my apologies (no matter how sincere they may be) in regard to being a neglectful correspondent are becoming tiresome and repetitive for the both of us. I have decided that a resolution of mine in the year of our Lord, two thousand and fourteen, will be to pen a letter, at the very least, once every fortnight. While I am quite aware that this is an ambitious pursuit for a lazy creature, such as myself, I am quite determined to succeed. 

Now, Jane, as you will remember, I am currently touring the country with a musical production called "Are You My Mother?" I must say that it has been quite the experience thus far! I must confess that the cast and I are getting on exceedingly well, and are having a generally lovely time traveling together. That being said, it is not an easy lifestyle, constantly cohabitating and hardly ever having a moment to ones self. During this nomadic and hectitc time, I often recall that you too moved around quite a bit in your adult years. I will do well to remember that I am not the only one who has known what it is to feel like a wandering vagabond. 

In truth, Jane, I am finding it difficult to compose this letter because I feel as though I have so much to speak about. Where do I begin? I suppose that I shall start with introducing my fellow cast members and supply you with a brief backgroud on each of them. (I fear that they may read this and be very skeptical of what I may or may not say about them, but they should have no reason to worry for I would never (intentionally) embarass them!) Allow me to begin their biographies in alphabetical order:

Charles Armstrong (Dog): Dearest Charles is the veteran touring actor of our little family and consequently the only male in the group. Charles portrays Dog in our show and is understandably a favorite character amongst the children who see our production. He brings honesty, joy and humor to the role and it is a pleasure to perform with him. Additionally, he introduced our group to "the cow game" and it often keeps us occupied for long hours in the van. (The rules of the game are simple. If you see a cow you must instantly exclaim, "COW!" Should another person speak it first, you will not get the point. I must warn you that there is a significant challenge in this game, though. Be aware that should someone see a cemetery, cross, or memorial, they have the ability to wipe out half of your cow points. When this happens, a great sadness overcomes your being, and you almost lose the will to continue searching for cows. There are a few more minor guidelines but this explanation is sufficient for the time being, I think.)

Hanna Baxter (Baby Bird): Hanna is in her early twenties and a wonderful young lady. In terms of her theatrical abilities, she has a wonderful singing voice and brings an endearing innocence and vulnerability to the character of Baby Bird. She may appear younger than her years, but she is quite mature and is often the realist of the group. Hanna is quite good at providing the voice of reason to our small group when we find ourselves lost or indecisive. In addition, she is amazingly adept at navigating us to our destinations when our Global Positioning System decides to cease working and leave us in depths of despair while driving in the van. 

Melissa Erickson (Stage Manager): What can I say about our dearest Melissa? For one thing, she is from Utah, Jane, and that alone says a great deal. (I leave it at this for I know she will recognize the alterior meaning in this. My sincerest apologies for the vagueness, Jane.) Melissa is the backbone of our group. This young lady not only does the majority of the driving, but she contacts every single venue where we will perform while on tour, operates our sound system during performances, and most importantly acts as our leader every day. We would surely be lost without her (and subsequently, her sense of humor!). Lastly, I know without a doubt that she favors waffles for breakfast above all other breakfast food, and I often enjoy teasing her on this subject. Luckily for her, nearly every inn that we have ventured to offers these for breakfast. 

Leslie Kyle Hudson (Cat): Leslie, is without a doubt, a kindred spirit. As Cat, Leslie brings an amusing, rebelious personality to the ensemble while singing with a pure and sweet soprano voice. She is a true talent and without a doubt another favorite of the children! We have become fast friends and often entertain each other in the van by improvising original characters that we create on the spot...I understand that this may be a confusing notion. Unfortuantely, our little characters can be quite vexing to the rest of our friends in the van, and for this I hope they accept our sincerest apologies. One of Leslie's most interesting characters is named Denise. Densie is quite devious and often enjoys getting on my last nerve as well while creating as much mischeif as humanly possible. Leslie, being the youngest of the group often has the most energy, unless she has not had her morning coffee (perferably from an establishment known as the Starbucks). One will be able to recognize when Leslie is not her usual energetic self if she has her sunglasses on and music playing. WARNING: Do not engage in conversation if this is the case. 

There you have it, Jane, the unauthorized biographies of my fellow castmates. We have been to quite a few places already, but one of my favorites thus far has been without a doubt, Niagara Falls, New York. During this expedition, we not only had the opportunity to perform the show in Buffalo, New York, but we were able to act as tourists for a little while as well! I am excited to say that I traveled to the actual Niagara Falls (on American territory) and it was great fun, although I did think they would be larger than they actually were. (I stated this opinion quite a few times while we explored the area to the dismay of my companions.) Later in the evening on our second day, we ventured to a nearby casino (a gambling establishment), and quite a bit of tom foolery followed soon after we arrived. I learned quite a few lessons that evening, Jane. I shall list them for you now.

1. Gambling is not a poor man's sport.
2. Ten dollars goes quickly.
3. Carry cash so you are not forced to borrow from friends.
4. Learn what all of the buttons mean on each slot machine.
5. If you reach twenty-seven dollars, cash out immediately, for you will not do better than this.
6. Take off your jacket because the adrenaline rush forces you to sweat profusely.
7. Put your hair in a neat bun as it will fall in your face as you dance to the beat of the slot machine songs and sounds.
8. Do not continue betting your money if you are constantly losing.
9. Do not become defensive if you misunderstand the intentions and facial expressions of your surrounding friends. They are not judging you, they are judging other casino patrons being escorted off the grounds. Relax and breath.
10. Partially pay back your friend with the seven dollars you finally end up with. 
11. Realize that only losing three dollars is a small, but mighty victory.
12. If you are winning at a machine, give it up for no man (or woman).
13. Take advantage of the free soda.
14. Pictures are not allowed. Our apologies.
15. Have fun (even if Leslie, Charles and Melissa win big while you and Hanna do not).

There you have it, Jane, a few stories and introductions from the beginning of my tour experience. I hope to write again in a couple of weeks, but in the meantime, I will keep track of amusing anecdotes to supply you with in my next letter. Also, I will do my best to continue to get to know myself on this journey; I dare say it will be entertaining, to say the least.

Yours Faithfully,

Amanda

Niagara Falls: Leslie and I trying to recreate the famous pose from the movie, "Titanic," when Jack and Rose seem to fly at the bow of the doomed ship.

A happy "selfie" with our cashout vouchers. NOTE: Mine did not stay at $20.00, for  I did not know when to quit. I tasted money and power and needed more. I lost it all. In this photo: myself, Charles & Melissa.

The cast and set of "Are You My Mother?"
From left: Hanna Baxter, Amanda Forker, Leslie Hudson, Charles Armstrong

THE Niagara Falls. Again, I thought they were bigger.